Thursday, November 24, 2005

Hunger Strike - Day One

The Democratic Party has been acting rather strange lately. Every time I catch up on the news I always shake my head and say something like, “did Howard Dean really say that?” or “isn’t John Kerry acting a little bit weird?”.

Now a shocking story has been revealed. When Special Prosecutor Patrick Fitzgerald served a subpoena to NY Times correspondent, Judith Miller, it was widely known that he was trying to extract a lot more information than just some kibbles and bits about a White House leak. Something really big was brewing.

Now the truth is out. The Conservative Post has published an article revealing that the investigation is actually focusing on the Democratic Party. Indictments will soon be served alleging that the Democrats have been pushing drugs in order to brainwash their party faithful into a doped out frenzy of Bush Hate! Face it, Ted Kennedy had to be on crack when he said, “Shamefully, we now learn that Saddam’s torture chambers reopened under new management: U.S. management.”

A Racist hurricane, Korans small enough to be flushed down a toilet and the flip flopping statement “I actually did vote for the $87 billion before I voted against it”…now it all finally makes sense.

Executive Editor Howell Raines of the NY Times is known to be withholding information on this story and he is not cooperating with the investigation. Therefore, UNTIL THE TIMES RELEASES ALL INFORMATION THAT IT HAS RELATING TO THIS CASE I WILL GO ON A HUNGER STRIKE.

Please be reassured that I will have medical professionals monitoring my health throughout this ordeal and I will continue to post on this blog to keep you all updated with my progress.

Thank you,
Freedom Now

Update 11/24 7:34pm

Perhaps this hunger strike was badly timed. After 1.75 hours of brave abstinence I could no longer withstand the enticing aroma of the Thanksgiving dinner coming from my dining room. I had several helpings of slow roasted turkey, country mashed potatoes, veggies and the richest homemade gravy in the world! It looks like my hunger strike isn’t going well, but I am optimistic about giving it another try tomorrow (I will have to have dessert first, Apple Streusel Cheesecake – hooray!).


nanc said...

you have tossed whatz left of your testerone, friend. no one fasts on thanksgiving! of course there are liquid fasts, so put your leftovers in the blender on high and drink them - that's fair. i'm concerned for you.

p.s. how do you get everyone to wear those hats?

nanc said...

since i and everyone else do not want you to wither away to a ton, there is reason to eat and live again:

yep, aliens are coming to take over the earth.

Freedomnow said...


That link doesnt work, but if aliens are coming to take over I was wondering what currency will we use and do you know of any alien language instruction books.

nanc said...

sorry freedomnow

i think they're here already...

nanc said...

ad to that


yep...i don't know why it wouldn't print here...someone doesn't want us to know something. anyway i found it at current drudge.